After airing my view on this topic in my last article, I got a lot of feedbacks from many people.
Some people said loving unconditionally was a process to which I partly agreed.
Other people said somethings on the types of love which I did not ask for, while the rest perfectly agreed with me. To explain why I partly agree with the first set of comments, let me say this. Have you ever met someone, not necessarily the opposite gender and you are suddenly interested in that person’s business?
You immediately feel strongly connected to that person, no strings attached and you are ready to go all the way with that person, not minding the risks involved. If you have attained that height of integrality, you would perfectly understand what I’m talking about.
Now, let’s get into conviction. Some people were waiting for me to write this part before they air their opinions. Well, I need strong opinions, so, this is it.
When a person talks about conviction, people quickly relate it to religion, most especially, Christian religion. Permit me to refer to the Bible. The only way you can start your journey in a genuine Christian race is through repentance and conviction. When you accept the Lord Jesus Christ as the ruler of your life and your heart bears you witness (that is conviction) Religion aside, conviction is abstract. It is deep and inward.
Conviction deals with the soul. It is when your soul bears you witness that something had taken place. Truthfully, marriage is solely the legal and sacred binding of two souls, not necessarily two spirits or bodies. Souls that would connect to become one, of the same desire and pain. If you love someone unconditionally and your heart bears you witness that you do, you hurt as much as your partner when he/she hurts.
You would try your best to make that person feel alright because that’s the only way you can also feel alright. Your soul bears witness that your partner is am important part of you. Falling in love with someone does not bring conviction, even if you think you hurt when your partner hurts. If you look at it criticality, you hurt simply because your partner is not smiling with you anymore since he/she is hurt and wants to be left alone.
You hurt because you are not getting the much needed attention from your partner. You hurt because of what you lack, not because of your partner’s problem. You are selfish. This is when you hears things like, “let me help her solve this things so that she would face me.” When there is a strong conviction that your partner is an integral part of you, you would grieve when you cheat because of the pain it would cause him/her, you would feel disgusted with yourself because you have disappointed him/her. You would feel like your soul has been torn apart when your partner distances himself/herself from you.
Conviction corrects quickly. It works hand in hand with your conscience, so as to draw your attention when you are going the wrong way. It pricks and tug on your heart continuously if you want to be stubborn. If you go ahead with that was suppose to be wrong, you have lost your conviction. When it comes to issues of the soul, a little thing affects, a little change mostly rewrites the system whether we like it or not.
Conviction comes immediately after total acceptance, immediately after mandatory acknowledgements, after you acknowledge that your partner is going to remain in your life for a long time.
Before you tie the knot with your partner, I’m a hundred percent sure that you thought about every little detail critically, examining each other’s weaknesses and flaws and trying to see the one you guys should talk about and the ones you should throw out the window because when you decide to go through with a marriage, you have accepted.
You have accepted to tolerate, you have accepted to learn, you have accepted that your opinions do not solely count anymore and you have decided to drop your ego aside, you have accepted that change is constant, you have accepted to share and you have accepted to be open and accountable.
Therefore, you are both are responsible. Both of you are responsible of your marriage doesn’t not work because of a glorified argument, you should be held accountable if you cheat on your partner because of lack of communication.
When you accept that your partner holds a major part of your soul, you learn to love that person unconditionally and you acknowledge that constant tug in your heart. You would understand that doing your partner wrong would only hurt you as much as it hurts your significant other. Strong and good opinions are sort for.
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